Tuesday, September 30, 2008

A DesWeekend

So this weekend was actually enjoyable! Friday was a little weird though... My cousin Steph's friend passed my name on to her cousin who lives in Columbus and said that if he was ever in town to give me a call. So he did and he came to pick me up and he saw me and I really think he thought I was black ( because my cousin is) and he was really shocked. It was a little awkward and funny at the same time. Made me think about judging people ahead of time.

AnyWHO ...We ended up meeting up with his cousin and we went to this whole in the wall restaurant that played live jazz and it was sweet.

Saturday I hung out with fellow boilermakers. There is a Purdue Alumni Ass here so we went to a bar where they were all watching it. Then we went to see Macbeth at the new playhouse that just opened. The whole time I was trying to remember highschool and what was going on. It was still cool to watch. Then we went to this wine bar then dancing. It was nice doing something other than JUST the clubs.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Beauty

So I hate going to the gym so to get me to excersise I have been going running outside...but then I realized (for the 100th time) I hate running I find it quite boring. so THEN I made my way to the Bedford reservation (one of the perks (may it be the only one) of Bedford). Its this national woodland area...or forest but I don't think you can call it a forest. Anyway this place is ridiculously huge. I have walked numerous hours in this place and have not seen the other side of it. I even run! Its not boring when you are looking at this amazing surroundings. Man God is creative. I keep thanking big pops for the gift. It's one of my comforts while here. I am not sure what I am going to do when the snow comes...I'm gonna have to go to the GYM! Blast

I got the most amazing letter from a friend today (via snail mail which made it twenty times better) BUT it just said how I inspired her and what not and then I got a text from another friend stating how God used me to change their entire life...dude Papa is soooo cool. I can't wait for heaven and standing before the Lord and having sin burn away and the jewels be left but seeing it now is so STINKING awesome and encouraging to see man the Lord it good and so BEAUTIFUL!

What else is BEAUTIFUL? My fathers trustworthiness, the word is a double edged sword. I talked to another friend and it was well not to go into detail but I felt like my friendships back at west laf was fading. I started getting this extreamly anxious feeling and thoughts/lies that I was going to be alone. Not in the sence of a relationship but of friendships. I will be moving so often and even if I make friends here they will be for a year and if the friends I have had for a little longer fade what chance do I have... and then the words that kept coming to mind were you are not of this world- and Jesus' prayer right before he was arrested. It was actually comforting.

Beauty

Friday, September 12, 2008

Good Week

SO this week was pretty good. It went really fast infact. I think I am stareting to except this whole coperate life but I still don't like it. I would rather being working at Weida still at our church helping start SV there or mentoring other women. But whatever..I found people to go to dinner with tonight its cool having people to talk with but half way through the night i found myself wanting to just go home and read a book or watch a movie. I wanted to be at PU and play games with all my friends ...... laughing and not talking about nestle and drinking. I am grateful that Tina is here and she has introduced me to people. ho hum

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

little or BIG

Little goals at a time while looking at the massive picture (yes massive rather than big) is what I have resolved to do to make it through this umm life? not really sure. But if I make little goals such as "one week at a time"... this whole five year plan dosn't seem so rough. The massive picture is God if i just think about doing things for him and ultimeatly i will be with him in the end it will be ok.

So I need a hobbie.... I really wanted to take golf lessons but I can't find anything around here that works. SO any ideas? The reservations here are kind of cool actually REALLY cool. They are beautiful lots and lots of trees and waterfalls, and deer... bambi and his family actually ahng around here a lot. I came home the other day and they were all feasting on the "lushes" lawn I have here at my front door.

Friday, September 5, 2008

The point

Life ... sometimes I really wonder what THE POINT of life is all about. I believe wholeheartedly deep down that the Lord Jesus Christ is real that my father God is faithful and full of truth. HOWERVER sometimes I wonder about him. One of my major questions lately has been if we already know that God wins the battle... or even yet that Jesus won that battle on the cross and when he finally comes back that the devil will be thrown into the pit of fire why is that we go through this masquerade called life? I believe this question radiates louder with me since I have left home (Purdue) and have so somberly entered the "real world"... I am surrounded by people who are only here on this earth to make money, drink alcohol and have sex. Why does the Lord want to watch this?

I was so content and happy in Lafayette and this may seem self-centered but I honestly believe the Lord could have used me in great ways there. Yeah yeah he can use me anywhere but Dear Lord please give me a glimpse of why I am here so it would be easier to go through this dark cloud. Being at work and making money is inevitable I suppose but it seems so meaningless. Walking around with the supervisors at work I have heard one too many times about how they work as many Saturdays as they can, how they work seven days a week, how most days they get there at 3:30 or 4 even when they don't have to...just because. FOR REAL?!!?! Lord please keep me from this earthly dwelling!!! If any one sees me getting there walk into that plant find me and pull me out by the ear.